Two Years. And Two Years, Two Months, Two Weeks, Two Days Sober Today. I Don't Know How I Initially Did It.

     Two years ago, (my two month, two week, two day anniversary of sobriety) my dad died in Frisco, Texas alone in a hospice as he had chosen. Dad had made no provisions for me to visit while he was dying.  I was able to visit him ten days before he died during the same weekend I took my daughter to the University of Oklahoma v. texas Red River Rivalry where she helped carry the gigantic Oklahoma flag onto texas soil in the stadium.
We visited dad the Friday before the Saturday game. We checked into our hotel about four thirty and then took a cab to his hotel.  We arrived around five and stayed until almost nine, when dad was dozing from cancer and pain management, and my daughter's and my blood sugar was getting really low.  
During our visit dad begged my forgiveness which I readily gave. He begged God's forgiveness which I readily lead him to the path's entrance. My daughter found on her phone Bach and Beethoven music and played them for dad. Leaving dad that evening after visiting and praying, I looked back at him as I turned to leave, and I then dropped back down to him and we cried together hugging. I told him, "Peace. It's all good." Then I turned and my daughter and I left and returned to our hotel.

I wanted twice (2014-2015) to win the annual Oklahoma State University-Tulsa Creative Writing Contest, with the poems I have placed he on my blog. This poem came to me each night for weeks as I began trying to fall asleep. I composed it nightly, reciting each line to myself, until I thought it worthy of being written down.  Then I began with crafting it into what I believed to be a worthy and dramatic poem detailing what I had experienced and what I hoped to continue experiencing.
My entry was not accepted:(
As I better understand the failure (75%+/-) to success (25%+/-) rate of sobering up, I now believe my poem was too dark, and I was too ripe for failure in my sobering up.  I am a twenty-five percenter my friends.

Here are both versions. My raw entry into the poetry contest of 2014; and my revised elongated 2015 entry. Bummer that neither of them even earned an honorable mention.  My hopes upon entry were that they would assist others in finding their Strength In The Forage Of Sobriety.
My 2014 entry is the first poem below.  For 2015 I wrote a second part, and it is also below.  In other words, pardon my being verbose; both are below combined as I entered my poem for my second and last Oklahoma State University-Tulsa Creative Writing Contest I entered.

Nobody ever leaves comments. For my poem I hope you will leave comments. You have the option of entering your comments anonymously, and I hope you do.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 August 2014

Challenges

I’ve always wanted to win the lottery.

I quit drinking ten days before this semester began;

The headaches were almost going away by then:

But the months of fitful sleepless nights had only just begun;

While classes, and study, and assignments and tests continued,

My courage, resolve, and determination continued to increase.

I’ve always wanted to win the lottery.

Admitted to a hospital two months before semester began,

Dad was diagnosed with inoperable cancer.

My daughter and I visited him in Dallas mid-semester.

We all brought ourselves to the terms; “Peace. It’s all good.”

Ten days later dad died alone in a hospice bed.

I’ve always wanted to win the lottery.

Ironic how sharing and bringing peace to my Dad’s death process

Brings my daughter and me closer together; She is proud of me again.

She shared after our visit with dad that she told her Grandpa two weeks before

That I was sober and how he replied; “I glad he’s finally gotten his life in order.”

Vitality deep within my being stirs my courage with vigor for living.

I’ve always wanted to win the lottery.

Six months of chemotherapy mom had endured by semester’s start.

Incrementally affected week by week by then, yet with courage unwavering.

She reinvigorated me towards my degree, unknowing of my conflict.

Mom’s positive inspiration and brightness always shining while she battles cancer

Is a continuing light for me; meanwhile her war is becoming one of slow attrition.

I’ve always wanted to win the lottery.

Slowly and steadily I climbed up and on through this semester,

Perseverance rewarding me daily in conquering all there is ahead.

Progressively I appreciate more about not only my life

But those lives around me without any alcohol induced haze.

Ironically this semester has been one of rewards enjoyed and challenges mastered

I believe with graduation I will have finally won the lottery.

Epilogue

Graduation Day 2015

I’ve Always Wanted to Win the Lottery

Ere too, I’ve always wanted to earn my college education.

This poem begun one year ago needed something more.

So I searched into my heart and mind and very being

And saw the victories and joys I’ve embraced this past year.

I realize just how far I’ve advanced from where I had begun,

Knowing that every path in life won’t be easy, it just is what it is.

I’ve always wanted to earn my college education.

From what I’ve sacrificed since beginning my college career

I have grown in depth one thousand times the distance to the sun.

Clearly now I see all of what there is for me to be;

Comfortable with whom I am and what is there for me.  

I look out through the windows of possibilities and see my happiness.

I’ve always wanted to earn my college education.

Mom died peacefully Friday of dead week fall 2014; finals loomed ahead.

School my singular other focus was both a distraction and distracted.

I proceeded forward towards the completion of the goals I set out to accomplish;

There was none other path but completion, and like sobriety I persevered.

Nothing is impossible I know now.  I just begin and do the task.

I’ve always wanted to earn my college education.

This my last semester before graduation

Has found me rising above and looking forward with expectation

To where now I continue life from sobriety and perseverance

I am victorious and also in control of my destiny now.

It’s not been easy however, nothing of worth ever is.

I’ve always wanted to earn my college education.

Mom and dad will be watching from heaven’s gate,

My daughter will be in the sea of visitors

Along with friends and my professors too

To witness my great victories,

As I take my diploma which I’ve earned.

I’ve earned my university degree.

Now that I’ve accomplished that

The walk for my diploma is another victory for me.

I have attained the best of life; my university degree. 

I’ve earned my university degree.

Oh, yes.

I’ve earned my university degree.

Not all of this entire journey has been easy.

My sole and only goal since beginning college studies

Has been to learn and earn the best possible grades.

I graduate with a 3.7 G.P.A.

And

I have won the best of life’s lotteries; I will have earned my college degree.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well?  Please leave a comment as to what you think of my poem?